Outcry At Non-Cheapening of Goods Post Carbon Tax

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In the eighteen or so hours since the Abbott Government pulled off a world first in reversing a climate change measure, an outcry has already occurred from a range of sectors, angry at prices remaining standard.

Bill Snelson, a retired taxi driver from Coburg is indignant his support for the changes aren’t being recognised.

“After seeing the carbon tax go down yesterday, I ran my microwave all night boiling bowls of water in celebration. But on ringing my electricity company this morning, they refused to commit to direct depositing the 50 cents I saved yesterday.”

Madeleine Crawford, an apiarist and caravanning enthusiast, was equally outraged.

“I went out to buy a third plasma TV this morning, now that electricity prices are going to fall. I tried to haggle an extra 10% discount out of them because of their reduced costs, but they wouldn’t be in it. All they offered me was a DVD of The Block Season 2, so I walked out. It’s disgusting how business won’t back the Government with their great work in helping honest working Australians.”

The anger is not universal however. Noel Stravinsky, a futures trader, is upbeat.

“I made the decision a few months back that solar energy companies, beachfront real estate and anything south of Cairns would take a big dive in value once the carbon tax was axed, so I got out of those investments in a big way. I put everything into firefighting equipment manufacturers, border defence weapons suppliers and any company contracted by the Department of Immigration. I’ve tripled my returns and it’s looking like getting even better than that.”

The Snark is The Creative Shed’s Satire News Section. 100% of it is satire and in no way resembles reality. Reality is way sillier than this stuff. Follow The Snark on Facebook and Twitter

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